Less Is More

I’ve been going through music and dance moves and making a playlist for my time in Haiti with the kids of Kay Anj.  I’ve been enjoying the process and thinking about all I will gain and learn from them because I’m showing up with no titles or formal training to speak of.  All I have to offer is passion and joy…and that is enough. I know myself.  If I had a lifetime of training, I would be tempted to rely more on what I think I “know” and put the joy of what I do and why I do it in the back seat (because, like most of us, I prefer to look or at least feel like a Rock Star at everything I do).  But the truth is, I’m just an idiot with a little bit of rhythm, some drumsticks and a deep desire to inspire a global embracing of the human condition through the courageous beauty of creative expression.  No one is expecting Ginger Rodgers or Ginger Baker.  So the perfectionism that would normally begin spewing joy-sucking venom at me during this process is taking a proper beating right now by a band of angels who are not concerned with titles, training or anything else I think I might “know” or “not know”.  I’m guessing they just want to see LOVE show up in their lives…that’s pretty much the bottom line.

So the pressure to perform in ways that may be beyond my knowledge or capabilities and really, the pressure to “perform” at all, quickly faded into the back beat.  I could now bask in the liberating process of putting my playlist together by just listening and day dreaming and not having some grand expectations because we all know that few things ever play out quite as we envision them.  And that’s when God went all “Jericho” on me.  Without warning, my cup overflowed into weeping at the mere thought of meeting these children, let alone sharing something so emotional and spiritual as dance and music with each other.  And, in that moment of overwhelm, in true fashion with His history, another wall deep inside my heart that had been put up at some point over the last 47 years came tumbling down and freedom came singing out from the rubble.  I have no idea even still what exactly happened.  I can only describe it as a swift removal of yet another layer of my baggage that God does not intend for me to take on the plane to Cap Haitian.  With a God like Him, everyone wins.  He didn’t just tear down an obdurate wall of pride for my personal benefit. He is also preparing this drumstick-wielding joker for whatever is necessary to carry out His purpose for my time in this place so that the children, as well as the guardian adults, can be spared of my self-doubt or self-importance at a wide range of levels.   I have not even touched Haitian soil yet and God is already turning my world inside out.  Tonight He made it clear that, while He may come in gangbuster, it is often through the path of less is more.  Fortunately for everyone, my role is less.